"When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained."---Mark Twain

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Character Flaws

I seem to have a few potentially fatal character flaws.     Much like mixing prescription meds, a mixture of character flaws can be life-threatening.

Character flaws do not come with a sheet of paper with fine print explainin' the side effects, contraindications, and interactions with other flaws.

It's "Learn As You Go".

I can be terribly sarcastic---that's how I got the nickname "Slick"--- and even worse, I have never known when to just...........shut up.

Those two flaws, working hand in hand, will get me killed yet.

Last night, in an effort to ramp up some romance, my husband was "setting the mood".

I don't have one ounce of romance in my soul so it takes a little work.    Character Flaw #3 maybe?    Valentine's day and our anniversary are two dates I don't look forward to because I can't grasp the whole Romance Thing and find it awkward.  

Well, he's flittin' around the livin' room adjusting the lights, checking the door, and doin' whatever.    He disappeared to the kitchen for a drink, and then disappeared down the hall.
    He came back, checked the door again, and kinda waffled in the living room like he was trying to think of something else.

I was just sitting on the couch watching him go back and forth, wondering when he would land.

I swear, I simply could NOT keep my fat mouth closed, and I tried to bite my tongue, but was overcome.

"Is this some sort of mating dance????     Are you gonna drop your wings and drag 'em on the ground???    Maybe hop back and forth on a limb??"

Needless to say, I thought I might have to fly South for the Winter because the temperature in my trailer dropped DRASTICALLY.

I had recently seen a piece on t.v. about bird's and their mating dances and before I could get a grip on my beak tragedy ensued.    The following is a video of the little bird that nearly got me plucked and deep-fat fried:


  1. Hey! Give him credit for trying to make an effort to appear persuasive. He could just use caveman technique and drag you by the hair into the bedroom. LOL

    1. I do give him credit for making an effort Sherry, and he goes all out! Between his bad back and my short hair I don't think the Caveman Technique is in the offing! Except for maybe clubbing me on the head...............................

  2. Remember Ron Whites statement when he was drunk.

    "I had the right to be silent, I just didnt have the ability."

    1. Suthern: I know EXACTLY what Ron White is talkin' about! That got me banned from a bar (by my hubby, not the club owner) and I'll be on Spousal Probation until I die.

      I wish I could blame booze for this one, but it was a bad case of Smartmouth.

  3. The romance bone seems to be missing from my wife. I remember trying what I am going to assume was a similar mating dance with her and all I got from her was a fit of laughter.

    1. Beach Bum: "I remember trying what I am going to assume was a similar mating dance with her and all I got from her was a fit of laughter."
      Similar to what my husband was doing? If so, maybe she suffers from L.R.L.---Low Romance Levels.

      If you were hopping back and forth wearing feathers like the bird was doing, well, I think I know why she laughed.