"When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained."---Mark Twain

Tuesday, December 31, 2013


Hands down, New Years' Eve is my favorite night!

It gets completely crazy in my little town and most locals rock it hard.

You couldn't blast us out of this trailer.     It ain't safe on the roads, John Law is EVERYWHERE, and I want to see if my neighborhood breaks the record for gunfire this year.

A few years ago we had gunfire for 22 minutes, sustained, when the clock struck midnight.      You cannot stand outside for fear of being hit with lead.   And the gun smoke gets so thick it looks like fog.

Top that off with an illegal fireworks show, compliments of some cagey neighbors, a little booze and rock-n-roll, and you are all set!

Stay safe, My Darlin's, and may 2014 bring you all that you desire!

As for 2013.............A. M. F.!         It was Real.    It was Fun.      It just wasn't REAL FUN!

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

A Hard Candy Christmas

This Christmas has been a huge bummer for me and T-Bird.

Our truck gave us The Big Kiss-Off the day after Thanksgiving.    Almost $300.00 worth of repairs.
    This was followed by THREE hospital bills and one radiology bill that hit the mailbox before we could get the truck fixed.
     TWO auto insurance payments were also due.    Plus taxes on my "fishcamp" trailer.

After adding all of THAT to the regular monthly bills, there is no HA-HA-HA (MONEY) in my HO-HO-HO this year.

Yep.     A Hard Candy Christmas.       When Bosslady told me I would be working during The Holidays while she went out of town to party, it licked all the red off of my candy.

Caught up in the disappointment, The Reason For The Season passed me by, and that's MY fault.     As a Southern Baptist---yes, I'm one of  THOSE!!!--- I'm supposed to know better.

In an effort to post SOMETHING for Christmas,  I searched YouTube for inspiration and actually found it.

This story,  99 years old and almost forgotten by History, should give a spark of Hope and Joy to anyone.

Have a MERRY CHRISTMAS, y'all!       


Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Sirens And Howls

When you hear sirens, you start lookin'.   Somethin's comin' and you need to get out of the way.

I can't tell one siren from another.    Sound-wise, they all sound the same to me.    I'm not tone deaf;   I don't pay attention.     I just start lookin' for a place to pull over and try to figger out where the squad car/firetruck/ambulance IS.   

I hate those sounds because they always mean somebody somewhere has a BAAAAAD problem of some kind. 

I went to the grocery store one day with my mother.       We were in the checkout line when we heard the sirens, and looked up to see a firetruck whizz by.     Ever The Smartass, I said to Mama:    "Looks like they're headed to YOUR house!"

My mother pointed out that I was NOT funny.

When we came to Mama's block......uh huh.     The downstairs bathroom was in flames, thanks to the water heater.    Had my sister not been home they would have lost it all.     I stopped making those kinds of jokes.

After following a screaming ambulance with my son in it once, I have a real loathing for sirens.    Didn't pay attention to the sound because I was busy praying.

Yesterday, on my way back to work, I ended up behind two ambulances headed out of town and I was relieved to find myself out of their way.

If one is bad, two has GOT to be worse.

I had been back on the job site for about thirty minutes when I heard howls.    Every dog in the boss's neighborhood..............howling.  

Sad, sad sounds.    Like they were crying.....sort of.

It's another one of those sounds that I hate to hear.    It makes my hair stand on end.

About 30 years ago Ex and I lived on the edge of town.    Just beyond our block was farmland, woods and pastures, and almost nothing else.

One evening, at dusk, I heard a dog howl.      It sounded different to me.    I had heard dogs howl before of course, but not like this.

It was........mournful.    Heartbroken.     Long, deep, painful sounds that I cannot describe here.

A few minutes later an ambulance tore past the house.    I remember running outside to see if I could catch a glimpse of whatever it was.

The following day I heard that a farmer, just down the road from us, turned his tractor over, killing him, just before dark.

I always think of that farmer when I hear dogs howl, and I thought about him again yesterday when I heard those hurt-sounding howls.    It gave me a bad feeling that stuck with me for most of the afternoon.

I just found out a little while ago that a man I knew in school died from injuries he sustained in a bad two-vehicle wreck.     That's where the two ambulances were going.

John Donne:  "Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee."

Never mind "the bell";  I've never heard Death Bells.

I'm more worried about for whom the dogs howl.    

THAT I've heard.